Pilning V St.Brendan's, 15th September 2007
Saturday, September 15th, Severn Beach. The one we'd all been waiting for. A beautifully flat track, facilities to gladden the heart and the most balanced supporters in the league. Right.
There is just something about playing Pilning away. Having gone there at the end of last season and been robbed by a dubious last-minute try, we thought it was time for revenge. We'd had a good pre-season, and saw the previous week's loss at home to Greyhounds as early season nerves; a blip in the push for the top four. We turned up, slightly late as ever, with a makeshift front row (take a big bow, Messrs Carter and Swann) but with the mobile pack and threatening backline to do the damage.
Early exchanges saw much of the play in the middle third of the field, “tactical” kicking from the Anthonys at 10 and 12 keeping Pilning pinned back and giving Captain King Prawn the opportunity to pinch lineout ball almost at will. Yet somehow the scoring stayed away, until an Anthony Kolanko penalty gave SBOB a deserved 3-0 lead. The Brendans pack was on top in the loose exchanges, and more than holding its own in the tight; Watkins and The Penalty Machine Hawkridge were everywhere (and even being subtle enough about it) whilst Hartley showed the way with a mysteriously new-found tackling ability. Where had he been hiding that for two seasons??
It seemed to stir Pilning into action, and soon we were 5-3 behind. A series of drives took the Pilning pack up the left-hand side of the pitch, but they were going nowhere fast due to good SBOB fringe defence. But in a most unlikely display of handling, the ball was sent right quickly, enabling their winger to squeeze in at the corner. Fortunately, the Pilning kicker couldn't hit a barn door at 20 paces, so the conversion went the same way as two preceding penalty attempts - wide.
The score remained that way until half time, which gave Captain Hartley the chance to show that he'd been taking team-talk advice from Shaggy. We got a bit of a bollocking. He'd demanded a 25-point half time lead, and here we were two points behind. Fortunately Kev McGarry, all dolled up to the nines, came to the rescue of our collective spirit and Luke's blood pressure, reminding us that there were, in fact, some good points.
The second half started in a similar fashion to the first, and again it was SBOB that drew first blood. Pressure in the corner gave us a lineout, taken expertly by CKP and driven forward in typical Brendans fashion. As usual, it was Dan Ford that emerged from the bottom of the pile of players clutching the ball, showing that he'd lost none of last season's knack of scoring in league games. 8-5. The conversion was narrowly missed, but we were back in front.
But that didn't last long. The Pilning kicker soon got the chance to redeem his earlier misses with a penalty in front of the posts, probably after yet another infraction from Richard Hawkridge. It was 8-8. Special mention at this point (twice in one report - it must be the hair) to Swanny. As Dave Watkins' opposite number attempted to swap shirts before the end of the game, handbags ensued. Seeing the flare-up, Swanny makes like a referee and tries to separate the pugilists. Naturally, this must be punished, and it is calm, mild-mannered Swanny that receives SBOB's first sin-binning of the season. Rumours abound that Fry and Groves aren't happy that someone else dare do the fighting, and will be going all out to set that right in forthcoming games.
And then it seemed like we were back in March again. Pilning moved forward down the left-hand side, after a long touch kick from deep in their own half. The referee was indicating a Pilning advantage as the ball went left - too far left. A foot in touch led the touch judge to raise his arm, only for the ref to call advantage and allow play to go on. Mere seconds later, they'd again squeezed in at the corner, and we were behind once more. Now, I might not have been playing rugby for that long, but even I know that advantage cannot be played when the pitch just isn't wide enough. Unfortunately for us, it seemed that the man with the whistle didn't see it this way and the score was allowed to stand. We were 13-8 down.
Time was running out. Fly-half Kolanko kicked right, beginning a period of pressure which saw Brendans camped in the Pilning half. Clearance kicks were fielded and returned with interest by the SBOB back 3, and we inched forward. St Brendans were awarded a penalty, which was duly poked into the corner. A clean take at the ensuing lineout produced a rolling maul, from which Jimmy Fry peeled away and blasted his way through a couple of tackles to score. He's a scrum-half, honest. It was 13-13.
By now, there were only a few minutes left, so it seemed that the following conversion could decide the game. Oblivious to the score, and therefore the kick's importance, Anthony Kolanko went about his kicking routine as normal. Until, that is, Richard Kolanko walked past and reminded his son of the circumstances. Despite his usual proficiency with the boot, Ant couldn't put this one through the posts and the scores remained level.
It could have finished there, but it so very nearly didn't. From the Pilning restart, the SBOB forwards gathered possession, not allowing their opposite numbers a sniff of the ball. Then, in a part-SBOB, part-90s-era-France way, we ran it out of our half. Through the hands quickly, debutant Ben Ward offloaded in contact to Chilvers on the burst. A couple of sidesteps later, we were in the middle of the Pilning half. With one covering defender to beat, the ball was shipped on to Dave Watkins, in support from God knows where. But not hearing Rob Hawkridge flying up on his outside, and just about to be tackled, Dave kicked for the corner. It wasn't actually a bad kick, as it rolled and bounced invitingly over the tryline, but even Rob wasn't quite quick enough as the ball won the race to the dead-ball line and we all staggered back for a 22 drop out. A mere couple of minutes later, the final whistle was blown and, for the second time in 6 months, we were leaving Pilning with a point but feeling like it should have been more.
The inevitable post-mortem followed, and for the second weekend running we were all feeling pretty low. We'd shown determination to recover a deficit several times, and there were indications of the sort of rugby we know we can play. But the scoreline was the bit that mattered, and we hadn't managed quite enough. We blamed Dave, he blamed Rob for not being fast enough, and somehow Richard Kolanko escaped scot-free.
But it didn't end there, oh no. Far from it, in fact. Because we had a social planned. It's Rugby World Cup time, so we would be starting with the Ireland - Georgia game, from which Whiteladies would be our playground. Or that was the plan, and it was followed by at least some of us. So while Captain King Prawn, Drive, Chilvers, The Watkinses, “aim for the chin” Patten and McGarry went out to spread the Brendans love, they were the only ones. As for the rest, your guess is as good as ours.
And finally...
Man of the Match: The skipper. He lead by example, swore a lot, and even tackled someone. He obviously can't give himself this award, though he'd probably try, but it's only right. And no, I'm not saying this under any kind of duress.
Fanny of the Match: everyone who missed the social. Every last little one of you buggers.
Ben Chilvers